Dear Diary 02

Today has been a strange day.

I just typed that and realised that I have a had a strange week. For the last week or more I have been going through a lot of things that would normally make me very unhappy only I have not been letting it stop me like I would. I mean my normal behaviour would be to get upset and go home. Only I have not been doing that.

I went to Glasgow to see "The Warriors" movie using directions from the AA website. It went fine until the junctions ceased to have numbers and I needed No.17 and I hit some road works. I got to a junction and Glasgow was sign posted in both directions - 'what the fuck?' So I took a road and drove and drove until I spotted something I recognised then pulled over. I was a ways away from where I wanted to be so I ran around the streets and, as usual, I was only one block away from my destination and ran past it. I arrived 15 minutes late and only missed the first few intro credits. The film was awesome. The early scene where the character Cyrus speaks to all the gangs in the park and the gangs cheer at these points the crowd I was sat in started to cheer too. Normally I would have got lost, got pissed off and driven home but I didn't do that this time.

I slept over in Glasgow and ended up in a very depressing conversation with my hostess, not her fault as I don't think she realised how screwed up I am. Feeling like crap I was all but decided to just drive home and do nothing but I didn't. I went to the Roller Derby bout anyway, fully in the knowledge that the girl who ditched me might be there. It was great. I caught the last few minutes of the first bout and the whole of the second bout. I love Roller Derby. It's entertaining, it's high speed, it's risky, it's competitive, it's sexy and at the end of it all both teams embrace, hug and peck and there is none of the hatred between competitors or their fans that you get with other sports like football and rugby. I know no other team sport like it.

These are just a few examples of me, in some cases knowingly, walking into situations that are of the type that usually make me run away. A few examples from the last week of many days of my doing this and I can't see a motivation for it. Its good I think. So far I may have been lucky, the situations have always turned out to be the complete opposite of my thinking. This makes me think my thinking is all wrong. Of course the day may come when my thinking is right on the money and that will be a bad day indeed, sure I'll get over it. I think that I should make it a practise. Walk towards the uncomfy scenarios as it is highly likely they will be nothing like you imagined.

I have had a good day and an interesting week. Highs, Lows and some real life. I hope every week is as interesting as this. Well maybe a couple could be less so and I could have a holiday. 2moro is Sunday. I could go to Edinburgh and watch more Roller Derby at a closed bout. It would be a chance to watch the first bout for some of the girls I know from my Doc work. I could go to the cinema and see some films, catch up a bit. Green Zone, How to Train your Dragon etc. I dunno yet

J